Sebenarnya esok sy ade medic olympiad intervarsity.
Dan...sy sgt stress skrg sbb tu sy tulis mcm ni.
This is totally not myself, i know i know.

Tp sbb tadi dah progress test for reproductive module and smlm plus pagi tdi dah jadi zombie preparing for the test, menghabiskan baca 34 lecture notes yg byk nk mampus satu satu tuuu in less than 24hours...tambah pulak dgn sleep deprivation plus esok xleh kluar hangout coz there goes my weekend....kena menghambakan diri for the olympiad thing, kepala dah rase nk pecah sbb kena study blk the modules during our 1st year of medschool. Jadi sekarang satu benda je saya doakan....jgnlah dapat panic attack, or mental haywire, or just anything yang tak elok utk myself. Sbb mmg sy xnak semua bnda tu, nauzubillah. Dan mlm ni mmg rase dah x boleh study sgt dah. I tried to force myself tp maybe it takes time, hence that explains why i'm blogging right now. I feel like crying right now...or maybe screaming...or maybe just sleeping but i just cant. Kalaula dpt baring atas katil, but it wont be sekejap sbb sy mmg xreti tido kejap. Hence...2 cups of white coffee will be my teman sejati. I know it's bad for the health but thats life kan. Mahatma Ghandi dah pernah sebut psal these things, it's a good quote tpi malas nk cari blk. And the problem right now is....otak xnak digest lgi all those facts, memorization nd etc. Tp kalau paksa2 pon ilmu xnak masuk whats the point?! But then, usaha kena tetap usaha i know that very well and my mother always...always tells me that if u dont fight for what u want, nobody else can help u, they can just tgk how miserable your life is and at the end of the day, kita jugak yang sengsara, so i guess thats what keeping me strong and motivates me to continue my fight.
I guess thats all for now. My brain dah ok sikit. I think i can start what i needed to start.
So...yeah. Semoga Allah permudahkan segala urusan for tomorrow.

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