I sorta rarely update my blog nowadays since im back to old style yowww...which refers to diary.
I mean..i dnt know..it seems more fun, more real..and more private to write my feelings in diary
Not that im cheating on u blog but....ok i think i did cheat on u, a bit maybe?
Ermm..
U see..this holiday..i sorta struggling to build a new me.
Or maybe changing myself to the old me..which is the best version of me i think.
The one who doesnt think of a guy while shes studying
A girl who doesnt care of her image and what people think of her
A girl who eagerly  answers the questions
A girl who finds studying is fun..and interesting
A girl who scores A in her test
The same girl who doesnt feel awkward in front of the guys she doesnt has feeling to
The girl who feels like shes a steel
And the list goes on and on

And now i can feel that the girl is missing.
I want to stay the same
I dont wanna change.
But because of feelings...and this feelings that i ve never felt before..
It changed me.
Quite drastically.

I. Just. Hate. This. Changing.
So im going to change it.

Im gonna turn off the 'feelings' switch.
Gonna forget him no matter what
Gonna stop stalking him
And stop believing that he had the same feelings too.

A week has gone and now i only have like 1week++ to completely vanish this feelings inside me.
Hope it s gonna work...

Weyyy esok test weyyy
Weyy esok blk weyy
Weyy xready nk test
Weyyy asal main2 ni
Weyy klu xdpt A cmne weyy
Weeyy mimi....
Weeeeey up.
Stop berangan bagai.
Weyyy dh pukul 12
Weeyyy otak mau pecah weyyy.
Jgn tido weyy

The truth is...
I m scared.
I dnt know why...but i know im scared right now

I know i should be studying right now
I know i should memorize everything by now
I know i should reduce my online time
I know ok
I knowwww..

But my heart...is no longer here in sg buloh
They re gone
Waiting for me at home

And here i am...
Broken hearted...heartless...exhausted
Hungry all the time..and being lazy as always

But i need to get there
I need to take the test
Need to maintain the result...or maybe get an A* or dist or whatever they call it.

Be patient mimi...
Patient

Oh God.

Did i ever mention to u i hate monday?
I diddddd
I didd
Yes i did!!!!!!

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